Well, I went from knitting to crochet. I couldn't handle not working with yarn. Okay, so it's probably doing NOTHING good for my hand, but I don't care anymore. Pain... It's just one more thing that will hurt. Whatever.
I have decided what I don't like about crochet.
1) There aren't as many good patterns.
2) Most of the patterns are "clunky." Almost representative of the old "Grandma Squares" that are out there in abundance.
Yeah. Those are the 2 main things I don't like. I love lightweight, filmy things. That's why I mainly knit lace. I adore that delicate look. Crochet just can't quite capture that as well. It's because each "bar" in it is created by making chains. There's no easy way to get the hole that's necessary in lace when it comes to crochet. So, enter the "clunky" look. Don't get me wrong. There are designers out there that manage to pull it off, but they're few and far between and rarely do they come up with something I want to make.
So, if I can handle the pain, I'm going to switch back to knitting. To heck with it. I was good for about 6 weeks and there was almost no change in my hand's ability to get better. Stupid hand. So, spoink on it. I'll finish up Nerd Wars with crochet and then maybe take some time off since the next Nerd Wars tournament won't start until February. We'll see though.
I'll admit it. When that pain flares up, it HURTS. It takes a lot for me to stop doing what I love, and I was good for about a month. That's saying something for the level of pain. Doctors tend to notice pain levels when it hinders your ability to handle day-to-day tasks, and I'll admit it. Knitting is a very important part of my day. Okay. And doing dishes and folding laundry wasn't going well either.... But that's just normal, boring stuff. ;-)
Gack! I'll get there. Until then, I'll do my best to enjoy learning a new craft and being able to expand my creative outlets. In the end, it's all good.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Sunday, December 11, 2011
And the pity party continues
So, here we are, mid-December and my hand is STILL messed up. Some of that is my fault. I'll admit that. The first and second braces just didn't fit right! The first was too small and the second was too... I don't know. All I do know is they were messing up my wrist since it wasn't allowed to move. Add in the fact I have narrow hands but long fingers, and NOTHING was meshing. It was a mess. I wasn't wearing it as often as I should have been because of the crappy fit.
I also started to go completely insane, so taught myself how to crochet. hehehe I learned how to hold the hook with minimal pressure needed from my thumb. I'll admit I still prefer knitting, but it's fun having another craft I can fiddle with.
I started occupational therapy and ... yeah. I'm wearing a different brace now that allows the rest of my hand more movement while keeping the "important" part of my thumb stationary. Only the first round of ultrasound therapy revealed something scary. On two parts of my thumb, I kept getting "zings" of pain. It felt like someone kept sneaking up on me and shocking me. At that point, my therapist got a little worried and started to go easier on my hand. Turns out those "zings" usually mean a tear in a tendon. *big sigh* So, we ended the session early with a little gentle hand massage and orders to wear my brace all the time. A day later, I took my brace off to do my exercises and noticed something HORRIBLE! The top of my thumb was veering off to the left. I haven't the slightest idea how that happened or what it even means.
I did trip and fall on that Monday. My son thought it would be amusing to crouch down by my feet and I didn't know he was there. I bet you he won't do THAT again. However, that was the only thing that happened out of the ordinary that week.
I have since returned to my doctor, reported the fall and the results of the ultrasound therapy and showed him my thumb. Of course, I got send right in for x-rays to find out what happened. Unfortunately, Radiology was busy that day. It's cold and flu season, so little kidlets were in there for chest x-rays and well... We do live on a military base. There were quite a few soldiers in there for training accidents. The radiologist hadn't gotten around to reading my x-rays by the time business ended. So, I'm still waiting for results. It's possible I 1) broke my knuckle as it's swollen or I 2) tore right through one of my tendons and only 1 is controlling my thumb now. All I do know is my thumb is still messed up and it hurts even more now. If a tendon did give way, I'm in trouble.... It means surgery and enforced rest for it until it heals. If that's the case, everyone will want to stay FAR away from me because I will go completely INSANE!
For now, I'm working on learning to live without my right hand as much as possible. It's so hard. I have to keep fighting the fatalistic thinking of "Well, it's already screwed up, so who cares if I...." It's not pretty. Usually the pain of that stupid thinking chases me right back in to my brace. That's the only time the pain subsides to some extent. I just hope I can find out the results of the x-rays before long. With my luck, they will show nothing and everyone will be confused. I DO know that the original problem is fixed. I am no longer showing signs of De Quervain's syndrome. So the question is, "what now?"
I also started to go completely insane, so taught myself how to crochet. hehehe I learned how to hold the hook with minimal pressure needed from my thumb. I'll admit I still prefer knitting, but it's fun having another craft I can fiddle with.
I started occupational therapy and ... yeah. I'm wearing a different brace now that allows the rest of my hand more movement while keeping the "important" part of my thumb stationary. Only the first round of ultrasound therapy revealed something scary. On two parts of my thumb, I kept getting "zings" of pain. It felt like someone kept sneaking up on me and shocking me. At that point, my therapist got a little worried and started to go easier on my hand. Turns out those "zings" usually mean a tear in a tendon. *big sigh* So, we ended the session early with a little gentle hand massage and orders to wear my brace all the time. A day later, I took my brace off to do my exercises and noticed something HORRIBLE! The top of my thumb was veering off to the left. I haven't the slightest idea how that happened or what it even means.
I did trip and fall on that Monday. My son thought it would be amusing to crouch down by my feet and I didn't know he was there. I bet you he won't do THAT again. However, that was the only thing that happened out of the ordinary that week.
I have since returned to my doctor, reported the fall and the results of the ultrasound therapy and showed him my thumb. Of course, I got send right in for x-rays to find out what happened. Unfortunately, Radiology was busy that day. It's cold and flu season, so little kidlets were in there for chest x-rays and well... We do live on a military base. There were quite a few soldiers in there for training accidents. The radiologist hadn't gotten around to reading my x-rays by the time business ended. So, I'm still waiting for results. It's possible I 1) broke my knuckle as it's swollen or I 2) tore right through one of my tendons and only 1 is controlling my thumb now. All I do know is my thumb is still messed up and it hurts even more now. If a tendon did give way, I'm in trouble.... It means surgery and enforced rest for it until it heals. If that's the case, everyone will want to stay FAR away from me because I will go completely INSANE!
For now, I'm working on learning to live without my right hand as much as possible. It's so hard. I have to keep fighting the fatalistic thinking of "Well, it's already screwed up, so who cares if I...." It's not pretty. Usually the pain of that stupid thinking chases me right back in to my brace. That's the only time the pain subsides to some extent. I just hope I can find out the results of the x-rays before long. With my luck, they will show nothing and everyone will be confused. I DO know that the original problem is fixed. I am no longer showing signs of De Quervain's syndrome. So the question is, "what now?"
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